Teshuva is on sale NOW

What it's all really about. 

The following ideas are derived from a shiur given by R. Aryeh Nivin on the 10 Days of Teshuva, and reprinted from a post I wrote to my lovely Tehillim group:We know that a mere 3-5 minutes a day of teshuva during these 10 days are worth their weight in spiritual gold, and that we are in the absolute Prime Time of Teshuva. Teshuva is on sale now!!

The 4-step process:

1. Abandon the behavior/sin
2. Regret it
3. Commit to change in the future
4. Apologize/confess



But these steps seem confusing and beaurocratic- "what do I have to do
again?" ..."What's the order again?"...

Imagine you were stealing money from your boss for years. One day, you
stopped (step 1). You stopped because you truly felt it was wrong and
had been wrong all along (step 2). You decided you didn't want to steal
from him again (step 3). After that, you called him to admit to him that
you had done it, all of it, but you're sorry, and you didn't want to
steal from him anymore (step 4). Done!

The 4 steps flow quickly and logically if there is a relationship that
you want to be repaired. In our case, we want to repair our relationship
with Hashem.

These 10 days are not about your sins. Yom Kippur is not about your
sins. It's about your teshuva. While doing teshuva, there is no reason
to focus on the sin itself. Hashem doesn't care about your sins, He
cares about YOU. He cares that you should reach your potential in this
world! He wants you to shine your light! If your behavior is preventing
that, He wants you to get better for your sake! We do have stories of
great tsaddikim who were able to focus on their sins (ex. David Ha
Melech) without pulling themselves down into despair, but in our
generation, we are not strong enough to live on that level and it is not
required of us.

Go through the steps of teshuva on each area of your life quickly, and
then move on, without beating yourself up (Chiddushei Ha Rim). Know in
your head and your heart that those simple steps wiped it all away. Stay
out of the negative and keep moving forward. Hashem created the steps of
Teshuva because all He wants to do is love you and get nachas from you.
He doesn't want to punish you, nor does He want to see you punish
yourself. So He gave you a way to turn it all around. Your nisayonos are
not your fault- they were sent from Hashem. All that you need to do, in
the midst of the trials and tribulations of this world, is to WANT to
come close, WANT to be better, to take the next logical step in your
unique Avodah, and that's it.

Example: a woman who gets angry 10 times a day should do teshuva and TRY
to get angry only 9 times a day, and even if she gets angry 10 times,
because she tried to avoid it, it's as if she succeeded.

If we approach Yom Kippur expecting perfection and promising perfection
to Hashem, we will fail so repeatedly that it will become a meaningless
game to us, and, worst of all, we may cease to believe in ourselves. We
must have an authentic, exciting plan of growth that is suitable for
where we are holding and who we really are. This world, especially
during the 10 days of Teshuva, is all about trying to move closer to
Hashem, one small step at a time. If you sometimes fail but you are
continually TRYING, it's literally as if you've kept your commitment all
along.